Viewing Easter

What better way to spend a long Easter Bank Holiday weekend than slumped in front of the telly? Well, let's face it, like most of the rest of the UK population, I wasn't going to be in church, was I?

If you're going to 'do' Easter from the comfort of your own home then you could do a lot worse (and believe me, worse was to come) than the definitive 1961 Hollywood epic, King of Kings, on BBC2. At just over two-and-a-half hours it was certainly an immersive experience, with a suitably portentous narration by Orson Welles, delivered in cod-Gospelese, setting the pietistic tone. Jesus, played by Jeffrey Hunter, was about as wooden as his cross, ironically only really coming to life as he was about to die on it  - but then I guess that's the Christian message - though his Lord's Prayer in the Sermon on the Mount sequence did bring a tear to this cynical old eye. It's always impressive to see crowd scenes in these old epics made up of thousands of extras and not CGI.  One marvels at the sheer logistical feat involved - all those costumes, all that catering!

The court of Herod Antipas (Frank Thring) was as camp as, well, Christmas, with Salome (Brigid Bazlan) vamping it up in high old style, although the seven veils were merely implied by a very pink chiffon skirt, disappointingly never shed, and if she actually got John the Baptist(Robert Ryan)'s head on a silver platter for her efforts, I missed that bit. I also waited in vain for Pontius Pilate, played as a cynical Brit (like all the best Hollywood villains) by Hurd Hatfield, to wash his hands. This fairly iconic scene, along with his offering Barabbas to the crowd as a substitute to Jesus for crucifixion, was also inexplicably omitted, leaving Pilate rather short-changed. And talking of Barabbas (Harry Guardino), he was cast as a heroic Jewish freedom fighter rather than the common crim of the Gospels. If you're going to do it, guys, stick to the script!

On Saturday it was Easter From King's (College, Cambridge, that is) on BBC2, with the traditional offering of seasonally appropriate hymns and readings from the stunning Perpendicular English Gothic chapel with its fabulous fan vaulting. The candlelit service follows the same format as their Christmas offering of Nine Lessons and Carols but lacked the same atmosphere. I found it curiously flat (not the singing, obviously) and uninspiring. I guess you can always rely on the good old C of E to suck the passion out of The Passion.

On Easter Sunday morning BBC1 devoted half an hour to Pope Francis' Urbi et Orbi Easter address to the Catholic faithful from St Peter's Square in Rome. The pontiff is recovering from a serious illness and it wasn't certain that he would be able to do it, but he did, before making the now-obligatory victory lap of the square in the Popemobile. The transmission was voiced for the Beeb by Petroc Trelawny, dropping in from his usual Radio 3, Proms and Viennese New Year's Day stints to do the God slot in suitably reverent tones.

On Bank Holiday Monday it was onto something decidely more secular: the film Babylon, starring Brad Pitt and Margot Robbie (an Australian actor seemingly standing in for Nicole Kidman, who presumably was unavailable due to better judgement). Well, that's three hours of my life I'll never get back! What a monumental load of tiresome old tosh - it should have been called Babble-on. This sprawling, messy, self-indulgent Hollywood movie about Hollywood movies, directed by Damien Chazelle, lacked nothing in ambition but everything in taste and discernment,  proving the axiom that less is more. There were at least three movies trying to get out of this one, making it a real curate's egg; good in parts but in toto a complete disaster. The whole (and I seriously question whether I should be using the w here) was significantly less than the sum of its parts. It had its US release on 23 December 2022. What a Christmas 🦃!

Roll on the Coronation.

Other viewing: Whitney Houston: I Wanna Dance With Somebody - stunning. Avatar 2: The Way of Water - so-so.  Pretty Woman - classic.

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